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October 15, 2007

Do You Want to Be a Hero?

by Shana Schutte

In the 1998 movie, Simon Birch, the main character, twelve-year-old Simon, is unusually small because of a birth defect. Even though he is little, his confidence is big, and believes God created him to do great things--specifically to be a hero. Though his stature causes him heartache, his size is the reason he is able to save many children when a school bus crashes into a freezing river. Simon climbs through a bus window too narrow for anyone else to set his classmates free. When I saw the movie, my heart screamed in jubilation, Yes! Simon's dream came true! He got to be the hero! Then my heart sank when he died the next day.

I couldn't help but think about the parallel between Simon's life and mine. Many times I would like to be a hero for someone, but I don't want to have to die to do it. Of course, I'm not referring to physical death like Simon experienced, but dying to my own desires. I'd rather be a hero by being inspirational, charismatic and impressive, but I don't want to have to suffer.

Over time, Christ has been teaching me that a paradox of His Kingdom is that death births life; losing means winning; and being the greatest means being the least--and sometimes that involves losing something I want so I can encourage someone else. You might wonder why it has to be so hard. Without experiencing heartache, we have nothing redemptive to offer the world. No compassion. No tenderness. No transparency. In Reflections for Ragamuffins, Brennan Manning writes that we would be "insensitive to the anguish" of others without experiencing personal pain.

Often when I'm frustrated that I may have to suffer to be used by God, I remind myself of Jesus. His great gift of salvation came out of personal pain and immense heartache. He requires nothing less from those who follow Him. When we will surrender to His way, our deepest heartache can be redeemed as a gift for the world.

While we suffer, we must keep love for others as our goal, otherwise we will become bitter. We'll demand that God explain why we've lost what we have, why He hasn't required so much from others as He has from us--and we'll cease to see the value of dying to ourselves. Only when we have God's heart of compassion can we say, "Lord, however you want to use me to help someone else, I give in--even if it means my heart has to be broken." If love is not our goal, we'll kick and scream our way through every trial in which God calls us to lay down our lives.

In short, when we realize that our heartache is worth the redemption of many, we will become willing to be a living sacrifice for God.

"You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good, to accomplish what is what is now being done, the saving of many lives." Genesis 50:20 (NIV)

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